Magic, Crochet and The Girl
Shes always had this smile...since the day she first could. Its an uncommon sort of bright that makes you grin too in spite of yourself, simply because. My oldest daughter came into this world in three or so pushes, nice and easy as far as the business of being born goes....an uneventful pregnancy they would call it. Life changing I would say. Desperately wanted, so needed and much loved. She is my first girl of seven kidlets. Shes my right hand man, my second in command...the little mother.
Youd never know by looking at her, never know by the musical sound of her laughter or her determined spirit that shes not well.
I got to spend the whole day with her yesterday laughing, talking just having fun. Well, almost the whole day. The first half was spent at the hospital getting yet another set of scans complete, a high contrast MRI this time...stuck with more needles yet she was still smilin'. Whats wrong with her??? That's the $64,000 question isn't it? I wish I knew....wish they knew.... Falling. Headaches. Twitches. Confusion. Loss of her sense of smell/taste. Female issues. Fatigue. Extreme bloating. Vomiting. Vision difficulty. And so on and so on and so on........ and still SHE SMILEeeeeEEEes :)
I got to spend the whole day with her yesterday laughing, talking just having fun. Well, almost the whole day. The first half was spent at the hospital getting yet another set of scans complete, a high contrast MRI this time...stuck with more needles yet she was still smilin'. Whats wrong with her??? That's the $64,000 question isn't it? I wish I knew....wish they knew.... Falling. Headaches. Twitches. Confusion. Loss of her sense of smell/taste. Female issues. Fatigue. Extreme bloating. Vomiting. Vision difficulty. And so on and so on and so on........ and still SHE SMILEeeeeEEEes :)
Im gonna brag on her for a second so just bare with me :P That girl right there playin in the leaves? Shes my alien baby....why, you ask? Well, truth be told she just couldn't have come from me. Some bigger, brighter life form from some far off shining star for some reason unknown decided to drop her off on loan.... to me of all people...to teach, Im sure. Cuz oh my is this girl full of lessons.
At 15 shes got years of life under her belt that 30 year olds would struggle with. She can cloth diaper a bebe` near blindfolded, run a household as smooth as silk and with the type of grace a grown woman would wrestle to muster up. She is a National Honor Society member. Shes known in town as "The Valedictorian Girl". She plays the flute, the saxophone, the drums, the clarinet and just started to strum her new Fender. Shes a compulsive serial volunteer. Shes the youngest employee at our local ice cream joint (that usually has a waiting list for hire). She sings. She writes. Shes beautiful and hasn't a clue. Shes generous. She loves children and they love her. She is responsible. Shes a great friend. Shes a great student. Shes self motivated. She can cook, sew, bead, crochet, knit, embroider. Shes a blossoming photographer with a great eye.
She can forgive. She is humble.
SHE. IS. MAGIC.
After our trip to be poked and prodded we had the whole wonderful fall day to ourselves. One of the things weve always shared is a passion of photography. Shes most often been the one patiently in front of the camera waiting for me to finish playing with her like a dress up doll but lately shes been behind the lens too. So off we went to find "the perfect shots". We drove around and found a few lil places we thought were cool until yuck n yack after some unfruitful pics we discovered our minds eyes were wayyyy better than what we were getting. We came home. And home seems to always be exactly where the magic happens. I grabbed some crochet, dressed up my dolly *oops, daughter :P* and away we went. Clicking. Giggling. Acting like girls. Creating.
She even gave me some serious faces....which can be hard for such a giggly butt...
Ok, maybe shes not exactly serious....
and maybe even she just had to turn around....
But still.....
I had a scarf {pattern here} that I wanted *needed* her to wear, cuz well she just simply rocks it like that. So we stepped out onto the dirt road in front of our house to see what we could see and..... wow......did
I. EVER. SEE.
BEAUTY.
And POWER.
and JOY.
It all came together to create magic. In the background shot here, the grey cloudy sky opened up with a sliver of sunshine....right on her....and she looked up....and she stole my breath....again.
In the end though despite the doctors or the clouds, or the camera or the crochet it all came right back to just this...her smile...me catching my breath, savoring these times. Hearing her. Being with her and really, at the end of the day, there just isn't anything else <3
Beautiful ♥ :') your daughter. . & your words xoxo
ReplyDeleteI am. INSPIRED. ♥ Thank you for the opportunity to get to see your "dolly" through your post and photos. I'm very much honored to have you making the scarf and her posing with it. Humbled and amazed.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing!
I felt myself crying reading this... sis truly is a magical girl
ReplyDeleteLovely
ReplyDeleteAwwwwww !!! Absolutely wonderful. :-)
ReplyDeleteYour daughter is stunning!! Sending prayers for her and your family. You have a wonderful way with words! Thank you so much for sharing! :) <3
ReplyDeleteTy for thinking of us.... she could us all the positive vibes in the world right now ... shes an awesome kidlet <3
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ReplyDeleteShe is absolutely stunning, literally lit from her beauty within. I do hope they're able to pinpoint the cause of her medical issues very soon. No worry is as intense and all-consuming as is the worry for our children. Beautiful blog...Thank you for sharing her with us, your readers, and please keep us posted about how she is doing.
ReplyDeletety so very much for your kind words .... shes a really really great kid <3
DeleteWhat a great girl you have and what a wonderful mum you are to shower her with love and positive comments. I send her wishes for a speedy recovery xx. I love the hat she is wearing in the photos in the woods. Did you make it?
ReplyDeleteokay, so now added to the list of all your awesome accomplishments, is the fact that you write so beautifully; hence, the blog, so of course you can write! All my life I wished for a daughter, long story short, I didn't get one..it wasn't in the stars for me to have children, although I have a 27 yr old son(another long story) I was his Nanny, and then well, so and so forth.
ReplyDeleteThe love you feel for this child is so beautiful,and that is exactly why she is- and probably a clone of you.
Thank you for sharing a look into her life; she seems remarkable! Btw, how is she feeling now?
Just beautiful, Dios De Bendiga, God Bless, May he give the Drs the power to find your answers, Your Daughter sounds like a true inspiration for us all. Oh and I love your scarf.
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